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Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

15.06.2025 07:19

Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

Do you think a lot of sociopaths' parents kill themselves for having brought such disgusting evil into the world? How much shame and disgust must they carry?

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

When do you feel most peaceful ever?

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

It’s here now, writing to you.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

I think that being gay is wrong, but I treat gay people respectfully like any other person. Is it homophobic? Or offensive in any kind of way? Aren’t disagreement and discrimination two different things?

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

I was tired of fighting.

What was the worst spanking you got growing up?

You are like me, then.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

What are the withdrawal symptoms of Klonopin 1mg?

I was tired of trying and failing.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

The sadness was still there.

Do you think Trump is a bad a$$? Why or why not?

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

Be who you already are.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

What was your best experience of having your navel touched?

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

It’s still here.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Why are Christians quick to say that there are a lot the gay Christians that exist NOW and use that to pretend that Christianity is just loving to gays when the last 40 years of my life they been horrible?

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

What are some downsides to living in Newfoundland and Labrador (besides the weather)?

And the sadness?

I had run out of hope.